My name is Jaden Love. I was born in Massachusetts and grew up in Maine with a single father and a mother who lived with multiple disabilities. At the age of 13, I came out as transgender and lost the majority of my family. I had already been dealing with relentless bullying, untreated early childhood trauma, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts. I coped by volunteering for various nonprofit organizations to help other trans youth put a name to what they were going through and know they are not alone. However, losing the support of my family was the final straw, causing me to drop out of high school during my freshman year.

In 2015, my dad and I fled to California to seek safety, acceptance, and a sense of community. At the time, there were no resources for single fathers with children. Therefore, we had to separate, and he went into an adult shelter while I went into a youth shelter in Hollywood run by Youth Emerging Stronger. During my 6-month stay in their programs for runaway/homeless/foster youth, I was able to receive much-needed therapy and learned a lot of independent living skills as well as social skills. Most importantly, I learned what safety and acceptance meant for the first time.

I eventually went back to school and enrolled at the Los Angeles Job Corps center. I successfully advocated for myself and became the first transgender male to live in the dorms on the male floor. I became the vice president of the third floor north wing, started a poetry club, and served in student government as the “chief justice,” where I advocated on behalf of students facing termination from the program. I successfully graduated with my high school diploma and a certificate in Office Administration in 2016. I was the valedictorian of my class and accepted the Center Director’s Award, the highest achievement a Job Corps student can hold. However, upon graduation, I faced another issue: I was still underage and homeless.

After having a panic attack on Sunset Boulevard one evening when I was 17, I was brought to a local hospital, where I was involuntarily hospitalized “for my own safety.” After being isolated and forcibly medicated for four days with threats of my hospitalization being extended, my dad fought hard to have me released and threatened the hospital with legal action if they didn’t. I was released on the condition that I had to return to the group home and receive mandated therapy and psychiatric care. During the next three months, I was subjected to illegal conversion therapy as they attempted to blame all of my mental health symptoms on my gender identity, specifically testosterone, and refused to continue prescribing it. Once my dad realized the nature of this therapy, he put an end to it.

I was legally emancipated at 17, giving me the opportunity to travel to Chicago for an internship, which led to an offer of employment at Trans Lifeline. I also had the opportunity to travel alongside the founders on the road for three months. I gained a lot of valuable experience and refined my professional skills while seeing different regions of the country.

On my 18th birthday, I was officially hired as a full-time employee at Trans Lifeline. I was also accepted and moved into a two-year transitional living program run by Youth Emerging Stronger on the same day. The sudden transition from traveling to settling down caused a lot of unprocessed trauma to come up. I started having severe PTSD symptoms and started medicating with cannabis to help me function and live with these symptoms. I also could not stand being in Southern California any longer due to the trauma, and wanted to get as far away from Los Angeles as possible. Two months into the transitional living program, I voluntarily exited the program, moved to the Bay Area, and lived with roommates in Berkeley.

Once I got settled in Berkeley, I enrolled at Berkeley Community College and started to get my associate's degree in LGBT studies with a concentration in transgender studies. Unfortunately, my roommate started experiencing a mental health crisis and became incredibly abusive towards me, both physically and emotionally. I dropped out of college, increased my cannabis use, and fell into a dark hole of shame and depression. Once the abuse got to a point where my life was being threatened, I packed a suitcase and left in the middle of the night. I was too scared to ask for any help, so I slept in a park in San Francisco before having the courage to ask for help. I went into a young adult shelter through Larkin Street Youth Services, where I found safety, shelter, and support. I was accepted into a three-year mental health treatment-based transitional living program to help me re-adjust and rebuild.

I was diagnosed with Complex-PTSD and received two years of EMDR therapy to get to a point where I could cope. I was encouraged by medical professionals to continue smoking cannabis if it helped me, so I did, and wound up smoking 1.5-2oz a week while also using concentrates and high-dosage edibles. In my last six months of the program, the focus shifted to independent living, and I received assistance in obtaining my first apartment. Things were looking good; I was thriving at work, had been transferred to the City College of San Francisco, adopted my own dog, underwent top surgery (double mastectomy with nipple grafts), and continued to focus on my lifelong healing journey.

When I was 22 years old, I came to the realization that I had cannabinoid hyperemesis syndrome after being hospitalized for more than a week, fighting for my life. It solved a two-year-long health mystery, which I was grateful for, but it left me with another problem of finding another way to cope and manage my symptoms. I eventually recovered physically and did get sober. The damage was already done, and I was back at square one. My addiction tore apart my life, causing me to get fired at Trans Lifeline after seven years of service. I lost my apartment, destroyed my credit, burned many professional/personal bridges, and almost had to give up my dog.

I have spent the last four years re-establishing my identity, healing, addressing harmful behaviors, re-entering the workforce, and figuring out what I wanted the rest of my adult life to look like. I experimented with blue-collar work, healthcare, retail management, warehouse work, and even started my own art business. However, I was always drawn back to the concept of peer support and utilizing my lived experience to inspire, share my strength, and hope with people. It’s my life mission to be as transparent about my experience.

If I can help make just one person shift from feeling alone, powerless, and defeated to feeling connected, empowered, and excited about the future, then I will have done my job on this planet.